The Worst Pain I Can’t Remember

The Worst Pain I Can’t Remember

My baby boy is 6 months old now and I am overwhelmed with emotion.  I have flashbacks to the day of his birth, the warm fuzzy feelings I felt that day when I held my baby for the first time.  When his slimy body slithered on my bare chest before his cord, connecting us as one for the better part of year was not yet cut.  When I saw his sweet face and we finally made eye contact.

What surprises me most is I don’t think at all about the painful “coupling” contractions that crippled me.  I can’t even really remember what they felt like.  16 hours of labour, no epidural, I wear that badge with pride. Birth is hard, even women that have to have c-sections, should be proud.  I find it amazing that I can vaguely remember the moments where I thought to myself, “I can’t do this” or I forgot to breathe and my husband held my hand and coached me through the Lamaze breathing we’d practiced.  But, the pain has melted from my memory, even though in the moment I knew, this was by far the worst pain I had ever imagined in my life.

I suppose these precious babies have a way of doing that to us.

I look back and can only think, “That was the best day of my life”…the same day I endured the worst pain ever.

And now I realize, my mother always said that to me, growing up. Whenever I would ask her “what is childbirth like?”  Her response was always “it was the best day of my life.”  I knew she had had natural births with no epidurals, so honestly, I always thought she was lying to me, but here I am, saying the same thing, she always said to me.

And I would do it all over again in a heartbeat.  Wouldn’t you?

KK

x

(Post by: Karen Knowles)

2 Comments
  • Heather Smollett
    Posted at 01:49h, 23 June Reply

    this just made me cry. So true and so well written.

    • admin
      Posted at 11:06h, 29 June Reply

      Thank you Heather!

Post A Reply to Heather Smollett Cancel Reply