19 May 10 things I want to say to a new mom
10 things I want to say to a new mom
Pregnancy is a beautiful moment in a woman’s life. Your body changes so much, and you realize, probably for the first time, what a miracle worker you really are by creating life. Life for the first time mom has many firsts and unknowns, everyone is a first time mom at some point. Lots of beautiful and not so beautiful adjustments to be made.
Here are a few things I want to say to a new mom:
- You can read all of the parenting books you want to, and still feel like you’re doing something wrong. Reading is a great thing, and preparing yourself as much as possible is pretty smart, but there are some things you just can’t learn from books. Experience is the best teacher in life! In fact, reading too many things may make you feel overwhelmed by all of the information, some of which is conflicting. My advice is to do your research, then pick a few books of your choice, and leave the rest for someone else.
- Your body will adjust. For some of us, worrying about the many body changes is a reality. We wonder if we’ll ever get back to our normal selves again, and truthfully you may not. I can’t promise you that you will have good genes, and not have any stretch marks, you may or you may not, and that’s OK. Our scars give us character and remind us of the beautiful life that we created.
- Sleeping is more like cat naps when you have a newborn, and lasts much longer than you imagine. Sleep deprivation is a reality. Not many newborns sleep through the night, and in actuality, newborns aren’t meant to sleep through the night. Sleeping while the baby sleeps is typically much easier said than done, but every chance you get, try to sleep a little. Your brain and body will function and react better to your newborn when you can rest a little.
- Forget nice and be specific. When you have a new baby, everyone can’t wait to come and see your little one. Some people are respectful of the fact that you’ve just given birth, and are really good at allowing you some space; others jump right in, and want to almost take over. Whatever you are comfortable with is what you should allow. There is no problem with asking for a little space and being specific on what you need vs. what you don’t. If you are offered help, take it. If you need help, ask for it. There is no shame in that, and honestly, people are so happy to help most of the time.
- Breastfeeding is natural but not always perfect. As with most things in life, practice makes perfect. Breastfeeding is the same. The baby is instinctively drawn to the breast, but some babies have more of a challenge breastfeeding if drugs and intervention is given. It is never the mother’s fault or the baby’s fault if breastfeeding isn’t going so well. Its more about practice and repetition, and most importantly, giving it a good go, and not giving up too early. Breastfeeding is a choice, and every mother knows what’s best for her and her baby.
- You will get peed and pooped on. It’s like a rite of passage for a new mom, at some point you will get pee-pee and poo-poo on you. Oh, and spit up too! You may be tempted to wipe and carry on, but that won’t work, because it will STINK. Pack a clean shirt in your diaper bag….just saying 🙂
- Trust your gut. Seriously, your motherly instinct will become SUPER HUMAN the moment your baby is born. If something doesn’t feel right, listen to your gut. You’re the boss and what you say goes. I don’t think any mother felt bad because she checked up on something she didn’t feel right about, and it turned out to be OK. I can’t say the same for the reverse though. Don’t be afraid to ask questions. There are no stupid questions, so ask away, until you feel comfortable. Your baby is the most important thing in your life so don’t apologize for doing your job.
- You will watch your baby sleep and check on them to make sure they’re breathing. Sounds crazy, but you’ll do it….over and over. Its OK, I think you’re allowed to be obsessed with your newborn. As mothers, we worry a little bit, and watching your baby ad nauseam is part of the process. Oh, the joys….
- You’re meant to be over-protective. Just like the lioness watches over her cubs, and will protect them to the death, so will you. It’s an instinct that mothers have from the cave man days where it was survival of the fittest. Pretty cool, huh!
- You will do it again. Some people chose to have only one child, but for many of us, having at least two children, is what we dream of. You’ll forget the pain, and the tears, the sleepless nights and the fears, because at the end of the day, having a baby is truly amazing.
Love & Hugs,